Thoughts, thoughts and more thoughts

After bottoming for Beefy Latin Stud, I was sort of all over the place.  In the heat of the moment, I made the decision to do it.  I reached down and lined his cock up.  I thought about it a lot in the following weeks (after beating off that night and many other nights).  At the time, I didn't think much about it.  I was acting on instinct and desire.  If I had thought about it, I wouldn't have done it.  I know that it is hypocritical of me as I have topped a lot of guys that way.  So be it.  But it all comes back to two things:  first and foremost, I'm a top.  But it makes a difference when you top.  It feels better to top without a condom.  It's bad enough that lube tends to desensitize things, a condom practically suffocates my boy.  As a bottom, it was hot doing something that you is not "supposed" to be done.  But it didn't feel different as a bottom.  As far as just doing it, we have discussed our status every time we fucked, before we fucked.  It doesn't mean he couldn't lie or be mistaken but we did have this discussion every time.  Does this mean I am going to bottom more:  no.  Does it mean that I am going to repeat this when I do:  no.  Does it mean I am going to wear a condom more when I top:  no.  I'm going to leave the decision to the guy.  If he's up for it, then I'm down with it.